To Send or Not to Send

I finally finished our family profile tonight.  I thought the day would never come.  Really.  I did.  And now that I'm done, I just can't get myself to click the order button to get it printed.  I keep re-reading it and going back through it.  Then I go on-line and look at other families' profiles that are currently active waiting families with other agencies and I start to second guess myself again.  I hate this horrible feeling of inadequacy that you feel while going through this adoption process.  Constantly comparing yourself to the next family.  Always wondering if someone will look at your profile and for some reason pick you over everyone else.  That's why I just can't print it yet.  I keep thinking that I'll get some major revelation of how to make it 100 times better so we stand out.  It's a silly thing.  I know.  But very real among those of us adopting domestically awaiting an infant from a birth mom.  Most people don't have to be "picked" in order to become a parent.  They just get blessed with the ability to carry a child...and the child doesn't have to pick you.  Then there is this side...someone has to see us as suitable.  And if no one does?  Well, then we go in the pile with the rest of the families that haven't been blessed with being picked.  I feel for those who are still waiting.  My heart goes to them in a way I can't quite describe.  No one should have to feel that way.